Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Spring........arrived early!

The long dark winter is over as of today. Not officially, but my long ranting and difficult post from yesterday entitled 'losing the love of my life' was very painful and there were a lot of emotions floating around in my brain and soul. It was soooo good to get them out.

I had gone to a Superbowl party the night before at my BIL's. It had been a highly emotional week for a number of personal and Exmormon issues that occur at times. I help monitor a group of exmormons on facebook called 'Others-Discussion'. It was started by a friend of mine who was with me in the facebook Mormon stories group started by John Dehlin. Its a good group but at times it struggles between two opposing forces as active believing members trying to find resolution within their faith, and those no longer believing who have lost the need for the LDS construct in their lives come together and discuss issues pertaining to their faith.....or lack of it.

Anyways.......we together initiated an effort to have a group where those struggling with issues pertaining to leaving the LDS faith could come together in common interest and receive validation and support. It has been a highly addictive, incredibly supportive group and I personally have spent far more time contributing then I probably should. The people, wow, they have been amazing. While my facebook freinds list was getting smaller and smaller for a very long time as the LDS faithful distanced themselves from their former 'bishop now happy' guy, my freinds list has more than doubled as a result of meeting amazing people from the exmormon world via the others group and elsewhere. I have also met some amazing mostly active LDS members who are at the very least aware of the historical and doctrinal issues that cause many to depart. They are a fantastic bunch of people.....all of them!

The others group was started in early October 2010 and has been very, very active with only 175 members yet 1795 posts. I was on there one time when we had a masturbation topic and comments were literally flying by. I would go to type and make a two sentance comment and 10-15 more comments were added during that time. That post was over 500 comments long. In comparison The Mormon Stories group with 548 Members has about 750 posts and it was started a month or so earlier.

Saying the Others has been a hugely successful group, would be an understatement.

Last week, however was the very first, real challenge to the group. Out of respect for privacy and to protect fragile feelings I will not discuss it here, needless to say, my old church wound had been opened and it did feel for a bit, like someone either fairly or unfairly accused me of, that I was acting like the bishop and the group was acting a bit like a ward. In the end.....the ward did something profound......something amazing for another human being but it was not without emotional scars for many involved.

I feel like this experience has helped the group mature, and come even closer together.

All of this, plus an additional emotional personal matter which I wont discuss brought together an abundance of feelings about the church, the decision to leave, as well as a variety of other emotions surrounding my release from the SP.

I am glad I wrote the post, as I think many people can relate to the pain, but I also feel like its time to move on and to once again assume my joyous and happy exmormon feelings and lifestyle that I now soooo much am privilaeged to have on a regular basis.

One additional note, Richard Dutcher of the famed Mormon Movies Gods Army series, contacted me after reading my first day of blogs and was so kind and encouraging. That certainly did not hurt this effort. Thanks to everyone who has helped me get started....there is a lot more to do now!

1 comment:

  1. Norm - I love watching you on this whole process. The Others has been a great "blessing" in my life. I wasn't quite sure how to take the next step in my life and the Others are showing me...

    It DOES feel good to be out.
    And I said this on facebook, it also feels good to feel the pain. Its ALL part of our story. We don't want to stay in the muck, and we have to go through it.

    Thanks for being part of my journey!